All was well two weekends ago when Gabriel & I spent my birthday at the hospital with Chris. We gave him a nice foot massage and left on a happy note – at least as best as I could.

But this past week I got an unexpected call from the hospital telling me that Chris had a large red rash area on his back, with blisters in various parts. The nurse who called me could not give me any definite explanation regarding what the potential cause may have been – just that to avoid potential infections Chris was put on antibiotics.

So today Gabriel and I made the trip again to check on Chris and all I can say is that I sure did not leave on a happy note. It is emotionally so devastating to see Chris like that – and as much as I write this over and over, I will never be able to convey the gush of emotions that always overtake me that first seconds when I see him at the hospital… sorrow for the loss of his life, pain at all that could have been for us as a family, for him as a father, for Chris as a human being with the potential of unfulfilled dreams ahead of him, the pain of missing my best friend and advocate ever…

Then I recompose myself and get back to my practical self and on I go to try to check his back… I can not even say how upset I was at finding him in completely soiled sheets – and again I get no answers as to what time he was checked on last. I had arrived at 14:30. This is such a horrible situation not only for Chris but for us as a family and the staff as it undermines the trust we have been trying to build regarding Chris care.

I cringe at the thought of how long he would have been left in that condition had I not showed up when I did… This is always the issue when you find undesirable unexpected situations like this… it may undermine the track record of good care while destroying the trust and comfort I may have started to sense. The blisters were all covered up so I could not see how bad they looked inside. There was a long red line running down on one side of his back. The injured area is large from top to bottom of his back but on the left side only.

I am not a doctor but it is obvious to me that it is NOT a rash as it was conveyed to me at first. I will hopefully get answers in the next coming days and will update accordingly.

Thanks for checking on us.

With love,

Koo