The moment Gabriel was born, nurses wrapped him tight after wiping him clean and put him on my arms. I looked at Gabriel and thought to myself: “oh, oh… oh …how ugly!?!?” So, not very motherly thoughts in my first minutes of being a mom… Then, I heard Chris’ cry, sobbing out loud like I have never seen any man – less even Chris – cry like that. Loud, deep, emotional. Chest going up and down, so strong was his emotional cry – Chris’ I mean. And the room broke in tears, all of us. I cried because of Chris and will never forget it for the rest of my life.

Chris adored Gabriel from the moment he was conceived and was growing inside my womb. He policed my eating and my well being for 9 months, and I can’t remember a happier time than those months when we were anxiously waiting for Gabriel and making plans for our life as a family, discussing names, how many more babies we would have. He went to every doctor appointment and the one or two times he could not, he made me take this very long list of questions for the doctor.

Then Chris got involved in everything else ever since… changing diapers, bathing him, playing with him, disciplining him, taking him to the doctor, picking the right clothes. Everything. There was so much joy in Chris watching Gabriel blossom…

I still hope Chris will return to Gabriel’s life in a meaningful way.

Happy father’s day, Chris!!!!!!!